Hands-on Housewife · Z's Opinions

Girl Worship Leaders

The “controversy” and the defense.

Welcome to Talk Tuesday! Today we will be talking about the role of a WORSHIP LEADER.

The Controversy

 I am a worship leader. And I am a girl!

There are some out there that would argue that “women should be silent in the church and definitely not be leading worship”. 

Yes, that is the opinion of some people. I disagree.

It’s unfortunate that these sort of things (opinions) cause such division in our churches. Especially (in my opinion), when there are so many other more important things to spend our energy on “arguing” about as christian brothers and sisters. (Not that we should be arguing at all. Lol).

Unfortunately, There were other subjects that were brought up about other disagreements such as song choices, clothing style, prayer, etc.

At first, I started to doubt myself. Why? Because I didn’t want to “stumble” anyone, and I for sure did not want to be doing something that was not biblical. When I started hearing that some people disagreed with my role as worship leader, it really weighed me down. I began to become bitter and started over thinking how I lead worship on Sundays. I had thoughts like, “I wonder if people are angry with me being up here?”, or, “are these songs choices “stumbling” someone right now?”, “Does someone disagree with what I am wearing today?”.

These people probably had good intentions, but didn’t realize that this disagreement with my role, for me was very personal.

It was more of a harmful distraction that I later realized was so un-needed and un-founded. It made me frustrated and distracted from what I was supposed to be focused on…God.

The Defense

Fortunately, my husband was very encouraging, as well as some other people who I really respect. We began to search the scriptures on the topic, and finally concluded that it is, in-fact very biblical for women to lead worship in the church. 

God can use anyone, anywhere for his glory.

Obviously, this conviction needs to be your own personal conviction, but I believe that God wants us to use our gifts to benefit the body of Christ (the Church), Whether we are male or female. We all have different gifts that we can use to serve others in our churches.

“We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us…
Now about the gifts of the Spirit, brothers and sisters, I do not want you to be uninformed.
There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them.
to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit,
And God has placed in the church first of all apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then giftsof healing, of helping, of guidance, and of different kinds of tongues.”
-Rom. 12:6, 1 Cor. 12:1, 4, 9, 28
The Bible has never been gender specific on the role as a worship leader. Some people would say that if you are a worship leader, then you are “shepherding”, “teaching doctrine” and leading men (if you are a female) in a leadership role.
I disagree.

There is a distinct difference for me between a worship LEADER, and a worship PASTOR.

  • As a worship LEADER, your role is to organize, lead in music, schedule band practice and teams, administrative responsibilities, motivate and encourage, etc.
  • As a worship PASTOR, your role is to lead every member in a “shepherding” sense, guide and counsel members of the team, disciple and lead studies, teach doctrine during the worship set or in a teaching role, administrative responsibilities, motivate and encourage, etc.

I personally have the conviction that women shouldn’t be pastors. However, I believe that God has called us as christians to be always ministering to people. No matter if you are male or female.

I believe that ministry happens wherever you are.

The worship ministry leader role allows for a lot of ministry. The relationships that I build with people who are in the ministry allows me to have so much influence, ability to serve, and gives me the opportunity to invest in them.

Do I need to be a PASTOR to do that? Nope.

Like I said before, ministry happens wherever you are.

sibling music
Playing and singing with my siblings. One of my favorite things to do!
We always have a blast leading worship!
music ministry
It’s such a privilege to serve with such awesome people!
Setting up for practice.
All of my babies at practice.




My Brother and Sister. Two of my favorite people.

The Conclusion

So, to settle this topic, I just wanted to finally put my belief into words. I have struggled for a couple of years now, how to speak truth to people who may have (possibly with all good intentions) caused division and or frustration for me as a worship leader.

I have come to the conclusion that God has to convict them. The Holy Spirit has that role, not me. I can only be obedient to what God has called me to do for “such a time as this”. I am not perfect. I am no “professional” musician (that’s for sure), but I believe God has called me to use my gifts in music and leadership.

Meanwhile, I will continue to be faithful and consistent in my role as worship leader. I will give of my time, my energy and my recourses whenever I can, because I believe that leading and serving others in worship is one of the most important things I can do for my church. I want to be an example for my children of what serving others looks like.

I believe in consistency. I believe in being faithful to your calling.

Whatever your role is in your church, I just encourage to continue in it. There will always be people who disagree with “something”.

Don’t be discouraged like I was. Know that God is delighted in you! He loves you and is using you in serving others for His glory! It can be so rewarding!

Isn’t it amazing that the God of the universe uses us for His ministry???

I pray that you will be encouraged.

Thanks for reading! Have a blessed day!



Hands-on Housewife · Z's Opinions

Guns & Girls

Hi! Welcome to Talk Tuesday-Guns&Girls! We will be discussing self-defense, CCW’s, the 2nd amendment and women with guns! Join me!

“… My Cold Dead Hands…”

One of my favorite quotes of all times is…

“I’ll give you my gun when you pry it from my cold, dead hands” -Charlton Heston 

The phrase gained newfound popularity following the 129th NRA convention, in Charlotte, North Carolina on May 20, 2000, when the actor, and president at the time of the NRA, Charlton Heston ended a speech by concluding:

“For the next six months, [Democratic presidential candidate and then-Vice President of the United States, Al Gore] is going to smear you as the enemy. He will slander you as gun-toting, knuckle-dragging, bloodthirsty maniacs who stand in the way of a safer America. Will you remain silent? I will not remain silent. If we are going to stop this, then it is vital to every law-abiding gun owner in America to register to vote and show up at the polls on Election Day.”

Heston then paused to pick up a replica of a flintlock long rifle and continued:[5]

“So, as we set out this year to defeat the divisive forces that would take freedom away, I want to say those fighting words for everyone within the sound of my voice to hear and to heed, and especially for you, Mr. Gore: ‘From my cold, dead hands!’[6]”

— Charlton Heston, May 20, 2000 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/From_my_cold,_dead_hands


family gun session
My handsome husband, Son Jesse and I.
Does all this mean that I love guns? H-E-Double-hockey-sticks, Yes!!!! As a true-blooded American female, I love guns. Guess what? THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT!
I believe that as an American citizen, it my right to “bear arms”. In-fact, in this day and age where morality is almost non-existent, I think it’s a necessity to carry a weapon, especially as a woman. To be able to teach my children how to operate a weapon in a safe way is a privilege!
Now, for all you who did not leave the website as soon I said that, you might ask, “how do I go about carrying a weapon in a legal manner?”.

2nd Amendment Right

Did you read that end part? “…shall not be infringed.” Our rights were written down by our forefathers with the intentions of giving the freedoms to live FREE lives. The 2nd Amendment is no exception.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like if we were not able to carry a weapon, and have the right to do so?

Chaos. That’s what would happen. Although this picture is a photo of the L.A. riots in 1992, this is a picture of what could happen if citizens did not have the option or right to carry a weapon for self-defense. Total anarchy and chaos.

“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” -Edmund Burke


Concealed Carry Weapons Permit (CCW) 

The sad fact of the matter is, California is one of the hardest states to get a CCW. Fortunately, in San Bernardino County (my county), you have a far easier possibility of getting a CCW. Yay!

The requirements to apply for a CCW in the County of San Bernardino County are:

To qualify you must

  • Be of good moral character
  • Full-time resident of San Bernardino County
  • Be at least 21 years old
  • Own and have a gun registered in California
  • Not have any open criminal cases or pending citations
  • Not have any felony convictions or specified misdemeanors per Penal Code Sections 29900-29905
  • Not be on active probation

To get an application for a CCW, just click on the link below. (You know you want to;)


History of Right To Carry laws:

Concealed weapons bans were passed in Kentucky and Louisiana in 1813. (In those days open carry of weapons for self-defense was considered acceptable; concealed carry was denounced as the practice of criminals.) By 1859, Indiana, Tennessee, Virginia, Alabama, and Ohio had followed suit.[5] By the end of the nineteenth century, similar laws were passed in places such as Texas, Florida, and Oklahoma, which protected some gun rights in their state constitutions.[6] Before the mid 1900s, most U.S. states had passed concealed carry laws rather than banning weapons completely.[7] Until the late 1990s, many Southern states were either “No-Issue” or “Restrictive May-Issue”. Since then, these states have largely enacted “Shall-Issue” licensing laws, with numerous states legalizing “Unrestricted concealed carry“. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concealed_carry_in_the_United_States

Women Should be armed

Did you know that 1 in 5 women are raped at some point in their lives (nsvrc.org)? That’s crazy!!! Why is this statistic so high? I was quite shocked! Did you also know that  As many as 200,000 women use a gun every year to defend themselves against sexual abuse (https://www.gunowners.org/sk0802htm.htm)??

Those statistics don’t lie. I would much rather be on the other side of that barrel then be caught without a weapon to defend myself and my family with! That is why I advocate for women, not only being able to defend themselves, but to be able to carry a gun for self-protection.

Heres another interesting piece of info…

Iron Defense Firearms Training


Meet my sister. Her name is Mel, and she is a firearms safety instructor! I know right? Pretty cool! She has always had an interest in guns, and has always been an advocate of women’s gun safety and training. She teaches people (especially women) how to handle a firearm in a safe manner. She is very knowledgeable on not only gun safety, but also the laws that are being passed to try to stifle our right to bear arms.

Her website is a great place to stay up to date on local gun laws and events. You should check her out! Just click here: https://www.irondefensetraining.com

There is a ton of info Mel shares on her website, and a bunch of opportunities for women to get involved in learning and supporting our 2nd amendment right!

If you  live in Southern California and would like to schedule a private lesson or maybe take a group of like-minded people who would like training in gun safety, hit her up!

Melody Johnson |       mel.sjohnson@icloud.com


Hands-on Housewife

Talk Tuesday: How to get your kid to eat healthy

How to get your kid to eat healthy

Ain’t that the question of the day?

I recently had a few people ask me about how I get my kids to eat the healthy food that I eat. Usually I just answer them with, “I just make them eat it.” But, even though that is my usual sentiment, It is sometimes hard to explain just HOW I go about doing that.

So, this is the topic of Talk Tuesday.

(My kids breakfast yesterday. Yes, those are sugar sprinkles 😉

Now, if you were to ask me if I was 100% THM, I would say no. Although my family and I eat the THM way about 90% of the time, there are certain foods that our kids can have that is perfectly ok. Kids have such a higher metabolism than we do, and are able to process and metabolize foods that we as “old foggies” cannot.

Ok….dont get me wrong though…Does that mean that we allow our kids to eat whatever they want? To eat sugar, unhealthy carbs and processed foods all the time? HECKLES NO!

Here’s a quote from a very wise woman (one of my mentors), that has impacted me so much in my parenting journey…

“More is CAUGHT by your kids, than is TAUGHT by you…”

This is so true when it comes to getting your kids to eat healthy. If you don’t eat healthy, and show them what it means to be healthy, then why do you expect your kids to eat or be healthy??? It’s just common sense to me.

(My boys! They love steamed artichoke!)

There is a time and a place

Although eating healthy foods should be a priority for us as parents, I am a strong believer in enjoying food! I love food, and I especially love yummy american food! Sometimes it is a good cinnamon roll, a good ole’ fashioned cheeseburger or a slice of pizza!

There is a time and place for those foods. I love when we are on vacation, that we allow ourselves to enjoy some of these foods. Also, when I am on a date with my husband, sometimes we will indulge and eat some bread and dessert! I just want to make this clear…THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT!

Food freedom is just that…freedom! If you become so strict with eating only a certain way, or never allowing sugar in your home…I think that can be dangerous. It’s ok to allow your kids a treat now and then. Now, this is just my lowly opinion. You have to do what is best for your family, and you have stick to your convictions.

Do I let my kids have candy every Sunday at church? Usually. Do they enjoy their Sunday candy? Yes, they do! Do I put sprinkles on their oatmeal? Yes, I do. Do they love it? Yes, they do. Do I often give them bread or biscuits when we are eating a low carb dinner? Yes, I do. Do they love bread? Of course….they take after their mama!

You see….there is a time and place for healthy food. The majority of our meals need to be healthy, and nutritious. But, when you have the ability to create happy memories, eating a good donut with your kids, then you should do it!!! All power to you ;).

Kids non-ability to function with sugar

I see such a difference with my kids when I feed them healthy. When I make oatmeal, eggs and Ezekiel bread toast, or healthy pancakes with homemade berry sauce. I notice the difference. When they have occasional sugar cereal for breakfast, they can barely focus on their school! I can only imagine why kids don’t have the ability to function in public schools, when all they are being fed is sugar and starchy carbs? Why do so many kids get labeled ADD, or other labels? Of course there are kids that do have legit problems that they can’t help, but I am curious how many of those things are heavily contributed to by what they eat.

“A recent study on sugar consumption suggested that higher consumption of sugar is positively correlated with a higher level of hyperactivity and attention deficiency similar to ADHD” https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3133757/

Workin’ Mama’s…MY HEROES

Now, there are many women that I admire so much, because they are single moms who have to work. They work their butts off to provide for their kids, and they work hard at providing healthy meals for their kids! THESE WOMEN ARE MY HEROES! I don’t know how they do it!

There are always those situations that are super hard to be intentional about feeding your kids healthfully. I understand that, and I know it is hard. It’s hard for me sometimes as well, and I have help!!! I know there are times when you are just too tired, or not able to buy healthy foods. That’s where you have to get creative.

All these different circumstances call for creativity!

4 tips on how to “make” your kids eat healthy:

  1. Be consistent. If I tell my kids to eat their food, and then the next day tell them they don’t have to, they probably won’t eat their food the day after. Be consistent in making them follow through and obey. Remember, they are YOUR kids. They work around YOUR schedule, not the other way around.
  2. Be an example. If you are not eating healthy, don’t expect them to. If you don’t finish your meals, have manners at the table or do what’s right…don’t expect them to!
  3. Be intentional. It’s hard work trying to get our kids to eat healthy…at first. I know for me, it took a couple of years before I started realizing that I needed to really focus on what my kids were eating, how much nutrition they were getting, and working hard at INTENTIONALLY disciplining them when they decided that they didn’t want to eat a certain food. Just this morning I sat with my daughter for 30 minutes, making her pick up her spoon and eat. She tried to refuse over and over again, but in the end…she obeyed. And she ate her breakfast ;).
  4. Encourage them. When they do eat healthy food, make sure to praise and encourage them! They will start to pick up that you are proud of them making the healthy choices, and it will really help them to see that it’s good for them.

There you have it! These are some of the ways that my husband and I are intentional about feeding our kids in a healthy way.

Our personal way

  • We always make them finish their plate.That’s a big deal for us. We have a strong conviction of not wasting what God has provided for us. We also tell them that “there are starving kids all over the world who would give anything to eat the way they do!”, which is true and needs to be taught.
  • They need to learn to obey in the small things, like eating. Obedience needs to start at a young age. I think for our kids, the age of 2 was when they starting “knowing” what they were doing when they disobeyed. Finishing a meal can become a fight, unless there is consistency.
  • My husband has always said, “They will eat it if they’re hungry enough!” Although this saying of his is kind of sarcastic in nature, it rings a bell for me, because I do see some of those kids around the world who are less fortunate, and it breaks my heart! That’s why I agree with his statement.
  • Our kids eat what I make. End of subject. I refuse to make a “special meal” for them because they might not like a certain kind of vegetable or whatever.  If they don’t want to eat it…they’re just not hungry enough.

Note: My kids usually love what I cook, and they usually eat it right up! It wasn’t always this way, when our first son was young. There was a lot of “trial and error” that we experienced. We have come a long way in our parenting, particularly at meal times. 🙂

These tips and tricks of ours work for us. But, in the end, you have to find what works for your family. However that looks like, I encourage you to choose healthy food!

My daughter loves my sugar-free Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip cookies (see Sweets and Treats page)!

I pray that this Talk Tuesday was encouraging to you! Hit me up and let me know some topics that you would like to see me cover! Thanks!



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